Learned Behavior

Learned Behavior

skinned knees - chocolate chip cookies
runny nose - chicken soup
feelings hurt - rocky road ice cream
broken heart - everything but kitchen sink
wonderful news – chinese food
disappointment - snicker bar
anxiety - lays sour cream chips
stressful day - m&ms
unending grief - box of ho-hos
long hard week - supreme pizza
self-pity – any form of potato
still in love – want to do better

December garden maintenance: http://ping.fm/hTbpE

Never

Today's One-Minute Writing Prompt: Never

Fill in the blank: "I never thought I would_________, but I did." (Feel free to explain!)

"I never thought I would feel sorry for my ex-mother-in-law, but I did."

My ex-mother-in-law is a two-faced, self-centered bitch and with the exception of my ex-husband, I have never been hurt so much by one person. This is a woman who welcomed me into her life and then kicked me out again without a second thought. Knowing her son was betraying me and keeping quiet about it was the ultimate F**k you.

I used to wish awful, horrible things on this woman because I blamed her as much as her son for the deterioration of my first marriage. I knew it was wrong to hate another person, but she betrayed my trust and it would take years for me to ever forgive. I will never forget, but I have forgiven. Especially after the unthinkable happened...

After years of wishing horrible things on this woman, her bad deeds finally caught up with her. While working alone one night, a man came into her place of business and beat the holy crap out of her.

When I found out about this incident, I felt horrible. A wave of empathy washed over me and I released my hatred for this woman. Although she is still at the top of my s**t list, now I only feel sorry for her. And I have repented - I no longer wish horrible things on other people, trying instead to "turn the other cheek."

Lost Childhood

I spent my high school years dating only one boy. We ended up married while I was still a senior and our first child was born 3 years later. As with most marriages of very young teenagers, ours lasted only 6 years, but produced 2 of my beautiful daughters. In an attempt to exorcise the demons of my past, this poem is dedicated to my lost childhood.

(Photo from DeviantART)

LOST CHILDHOOD

Just when I should have been
having the time of my life,
I thought I wasn't complete
unless I had
that one perfect someone to call my own.
Instead of hanging out with my friends,
I was caught in the loop
of pleasing my man.
My heart would beat faster as each class bell rang,
knowing we could steal brief moments
for kissing out in the hall.
Scheduling our after school time
so we were always together,
in hindsight was probably not the thing to do,
but the excitement and joy
and tummy butterflies
were a high we both sought to obtain.

Did the good outweigh the bad?
Obviously it did because we ended up together,
at least for a short time.
The problem is, it wasn't enough
to satisfy that need we had deep down inside,
the need for something more,
something special to fulfill an aching need.
So, we crashed and burned,
down in flames in a magnificent bonfire
of heated words,
angry acquisitions,
finger pointing and
screams.
Two lives torn apart, two souls ripped asunder,
but the fallout damage affected much more
and it would be years before the collateral was known.

Looking back, the path is quiet clear,
even a child could see the course;
so why was I too blind at the time
to not see the outcome
when it was right before my eyes?
I guess love really is blind
and it has the ability to swoop in
and steal our childhoods,
give us tunnel vision,
like the quest for the Holy Grail,
tempt us with a happily ever after,
yes, love is very easy to find,
but much harder work to keep.

The Many Shades of Black

The Many Shades of Black

Barnabas Collins' cape
Patent Mary Jane's
Dead of night
Vinyl LP
Toe Jam
Sin
Manure
Garden Soil
Evil man's heart
Depth's of Mammoth Cave
Moonless night

Smokey Mountain Bear

Superstition's cat

The Keys

(Photo by Dan Felstead of Wood and Pixel Narratives)

The Keys

The keys have locked away my heart

inside a special wrapping,

it waits alone

for the one I love

to keep it everlasting.

Cimmerian Shade

Cimmerian Shade
By Bobbi Rightmyer


At night ghosts of the past haunt my dreams calling for requital;
in the morning -
although they can't be seen -
they are always there, waiting ...

Violent clouds are not a stranger
where the wind howls in anguish and mourn for departed souls,
seeming to ask why are they dead.

Musty corridors in the manse of my mind,
lead me on a journey,
taking me to the dead world of the past.

Darkness perches all around
in seeming isolation from the world
as long shadows of fear reach out and try to touch.

Cimmerian shade has come,
forcing the hidden secrets of the past into the light.
Towers of darkness -
the symbols of mystery -
cloud the answers in adumbration.

The caliginosity stands as a dead reminder of the past
casting out eclipses into the night.
They will not die
when they reach out for another.

But the past has intruded
the darkness has filled my heart,
and icy fingers reaches out to other hearts
with a glow I cannot dispel.

My Life According to Heart

(Drawing by my daughter, Marie Huffman)

This is a meme I did on Facebook a while back, but I never posted it here. It was so much fun to do, you may want to pass it on to your friends.

Using only song names from ONE ARTIST, cleverly answer these questions. Pass it on to 15 people you like and include me. You can’t use the band I used. Try not to repeat a song title. It’s a lot harder than you think! Repost as “my life according to (band name).”

My Life According to HEART

Pick your Artist:
HEART (Ann and Nancy Wilson)

Are you a male or female:
"There's the Girl"

Describe yourself:
"My Crazy Head"

How do you feel:
"Crazy On You"

Describe where you currently live:
"Up On Cherry Blossom Road"

If you could go anywhere, where would you go:
"Back to Avalon"

Your favorite form of transportation:
"Silver Wheels"

Your best friend is:
"Wild Child"

You and your best friends are:
"Bad Animals"

What’s the weather like:
"I Need the Rain"

Favorite time of day:
"Strange Night"

If your life was a TV show, what would it be called:
"Kick It Out"

What is life to you:
"The Oldest Story in the World"

Your last relationship:
"Heartless" or "If Looks Could Kill"

Current Relationship:
"This Man is Mine"

Your fear:
"Voodoo Doll"

What is the best advice you have to give:
"Tell It Like It Is"

Thought for the Day:
"I Want Your World to Turn" (just for me)

How I would like to die:
"Rockin' Heaven Down"

My soul’s present condition:
"I've Got the Music in Me"

My motto:
"All I Wanna Do is Make Love to You"

The Tadpole

I'm am proud to present the first photo of my new grandbaby - currently nicknamed The Tadpole - at 12 weeks of age. I know, not much to look at yet, but I am so excited! The Tadpole is due in June 2010, and we are hoping by December 22nd - next week - we will know if it is a girl or a boy. I really don't care what sex Tadpole is, I just want him or her to be healthy.

This is a picture of Marie, The Tadpole's mommy. Soon I'll have pix of mommy and daddy both up for you to see.

Exciting News

Exciting news! One of my non-fiction essays was chosen as a finalist in The New Southerner 2009 Literary Prize Contest! My essay - "I Dream of My Past" - will appear in a future issue of the magazine and in the 2009-2010 Anthology.

"I Dream of My Past" is a piece I wrote about my grandparents farm and the experiences I had there. After the piece has been published, I will post it here for everyone to read.

Food Friday - Homemade sage dressing for the holidays: http://ping.fm/Kju97

Windsday

WINDSDAY

Oak leaves dance and twirl
like a brown whirlwind littering the air
as the unusual Windsday blows through.
Robins going from treetop to tree
teeter off course in the gusty gale.
Bags, napkins and other garbage
take flight to pollute other areas.
Flags snap to attention,
stiff in the cold air;
weak tree branches break and bow,
as young saplings dip to the ground.
Ladies over 60 protect tightly permed hair
with plastic rain caps,
while the under 40 crowd let their hair
blow wildly in the storm.
Garbage cans, Christmas decorations and all manner of yard art
have been gobbled up by the current
and deposited down the street.
Umbrellas turn inside out and no longer protect from the rain,
and doors are ripped wide open with the cold, wet blast.
Makes you kind of wonder if mistral gusts are meant to scare us away
or draft us closer together,
or maybe it is angel kisses from on high
giving us a whiff of what's to come.

How to grow holly in the Bluegrass: http://ping.fm/gExHB

We Are Mortal

We Are Mortal

Driven by fear and desperation,
the hours tick by
as faint whispers of panic become louder,
a suspected truth unable to be seen.

A brewing storm buffets the angry spirits,
coming out of a dim past to pound against the walls
demanding attention.
Thunder echoes with the whine of rising wind,
emptiness seems alive with a fright and tension
that builds on a single terrifying fact –
We are mortal.

Moment by moment, a tight coil of tension,
drawn to the breaking point,
seems like years which have halted the flow of time;
rooted in the walls of hearts and souls.

A instant of quiet,
the unending chill of terror,
as the hand of death brushes close;
then moves away, stirring the musty air
with a touch filled with overwhelming scents of
anxiety and dread.
My time has not come.

It's not too late to plant spring bulbs in the Bluegrass:
http://ping.fm/NTFnk

My Angel

My Angel

On windy days, my angel visits me
Blowing a breeze through the silver wind chimes
Reminding me to live my life freely
And not hide away from the rest of the world

On windy days, my angel visits me
Bringing me serenity with each gentle sway
Reminding to live in the present
And keep the past in the past

On windy days, my angel visits me
Whispering secrets with each little chime
Reminding me she is always near
Even though far from my sight she'll be

Food Friday - Black Walnut Bars:
http://ping.fm/grZvH

How to choose and maintain the perfect poinsettia:
http://ping.fm/dCsnf

A Sonic View

A Sonic View

Service berries, red and full,
continue clinging to bare branches;
water droplets from a drizzling rain
resemble ice tears
as they sparkle and brighten a dull day.

Majestic pine trees standing straight and tall,
like sentry guards
or some wayward big brother;
the striking green needles
adding texture to the dreariness.

Black walnuts gather on the ground
beneath the naked mother tree,
hulls fading from palest green
to ripened yellow-brown
promising yummy treats to come.

A lone red cedar towering over all the others,
watches over all with grandfatherly ease;
although no longer young and vital
the weathered branches continue to hold
a calm and peaceful quality.

Eye Spy

Eye Spy

Eye spy with my little eye,
a branch upon a tree,
and on this branch the multi colored lights
burning brightly for me.

Eye spy with my little eye,
a star up on a tree,
a special star to signal all,
so everyone can see.

Eye spy with my pale blue eyes,
an excitement all around,
from stores to homes with smiles and hugs
and special holiday sounds.

Eye spy with my grown up eyes
a hope for the next generation,
with freedom and hope and liberty galore
to bolster our fragile nation.

Drowning Shadows

Drowning Shadows

Sorrow creeps in,
a step at a time,
and eases its way into life;
robbing the soul,
tainting the aura,
changing the essence of happier days.
Worry, anticipation, anxiety and stress
replace the happy go lucky,
marring the image of pleasant memories,
drowning shadows of times gone by.
Why does it happen when you least expect it?
And when will it go away?
For sorrow is no friend,
when it drags you down
and invades your subconscious
without a sound.

Childhood Shadows

Childhood Shadows

The sun seemed to shine brighter when I was a little girl,
fresh dew covered grass would sparkle with the eastern rays
and a new day would dawn with excitement and daydreams.
Children were free to roam at will
with no fear of snatching or molestation,
and every stay-at-home mom would monitor
all the kids if they gathered in their yards.
Lunchtime would arrive with the rumble of tummies
and we’d fill up on sandwiches and sugar laden Kool-Aid.
Moms would try the old standby of “it’s naptime right now,”
but they’d only be lucky if we rested our eyes
before we dashed for the doors again.
No complaints of “I’m bored” or “there’s nothing to do,”
because children were able to imagine the possibilities of games to play
and exercise a vivid attention to detail.
Dusk would arrive with a flicker of fireflies,
floating on the nighttime air
and each child would dance through the grass
as they tried to catch the lights to fill up Mason jars for one night.
And pleasant dreams would always come as the children nodded off
to the tiny glow of lightening bugs in dreaming childhood shadows.

Why not choose a living Christmas tree this year?
http://ping.fm/5vt3D

Ted E. Bear

TED E. BEAR

The first day I saw him,
smiling at me from the shelf,
I knew he could be mine,
Ted E. Bear,
that cute little charmer
with brown fur and eyes.
I knew I was a grown woman,
long too old for childish toys,
but Ted E. was different
and I longed to hold him tight.
And once in my possession
I knew he was the right fit,
but little did I know that Ted E. had a mission.
As if by magic,
I was smiling and laughing again
and I felt like a child once more;
and I owe it all to a teddy bear my hubby bought,
Mr. Ted E. Bear, my friend.

Dark Shadows

DARK SHADOWS

Just a shadow of my former self,
the ticking clock moves on,
leaving behind a carefree girl
and replacing with a lonely shell.
There are echos of happiness
in the recesses of my mind,
but they are harder to find,
trapped in an ever turning loop
behind the dark shadows of time.
No more ponytails or Indian sandals,
no Chinese jumprope or Red Rover, Red Rover,
no long afternoon walks
or wild motorcycle rides,
the simple life is gone.
When your head-over-heels first time love
throws a hand grenade at your life,
the dark shadows come flowing in.
After the first time, the next are easier,
and long before you know it,
your locked away inside yourself
and each bad turn buries you deeper away
and dark shadows swallow your soul.